William Schwenck Gilbert (Уильям Швенк Гилберт)

Songs of a Savoyard. They'll None of 'Em Be Missed

  As some day it may happen that a victim must be found,
    I've got a little list--I've got a little list
  Of social offenders who might well be underground,
    And who never would be missed--who never would be missed!
  There's the pestilential nuisances who write for autographs--
  All people who have flabby hands and irritating laughs--
  All children who are up in dates, and floor you with 'em flat--
  All persons who in shaking hands, shake hands with you like _that_--
  And all third persons who on spoiling _tete-a-tetes_ insist--
    They'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be missed!

  There's the nigger serenader, and the others of his race,
    And the piano organist--I've got him on the list!
  And the people who eat peppermint and puff it in your face,
    They never would be missed--they never would be missed!
  Then the idiot who praises, with enthusiastic tone,
  All centuries but this, and every country but his own;
  And the lady from the provinces, who dresses like a guy,
  And who doesn't think she waltzes, but would rather like to try;
  And that singular anomaly, the lady novelist--
    I don't think she'd be missed--I'm _sure_ she'd not be missed!

  And that _Nisi Prius_ nuisance, who just now is rather rife,
    The Judicial humorist--I've got _him_ on the list!
  All funny fellows, comic men, and clowns of private life--
    They'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of them be missed.
  And apologetic statesmen of the compromising kind,
  Such as--What-d'ye-call-him--Thing'em-Bob, and likewise--Never-mind,
  And 'St--'st--'st--and What's-his-name, and also--You-know-who--
  (The task of filling up the blanks I'd rather leave to _you_!)
  But it really doesn't matter whom you put upon the list,
    For they'd none of 'em be missed--they'd none of 'em be missed!

1. Songs of a Savoyard. Only Roses!
2. Songs of a Savoyard. A Recipe
3. Songs of a Savoyard. Eheu Fugaces--!
4. Songs of a Savoyard. The First Lord's Song
5. Songs of a Savoyard. The Highly Respectable Gondolier

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Количество обращений к стихотворению: 1554

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