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Arthur Conan Doyle (Артур Конан Дойль) «The Guards Came Through» (1919). 7. Grousing "The army swore terribly in Flanders." Uncle Toby. What do the soldiers say? "Dam! Dam! Dam! I don't mind cold, I don't mind heat, Over the top for a Sunday treat, With Fritz I'll always take my spell, But I want my grub, and where in hell Is the jam?" What does the officer say? "Dam! Dam! Dam! Mud and misery, flies and stench, Piggin' it here in a beastly trench, But what I mean, by Jove, you see, I like my men and they don't mind me, So, on the whole, I'd rather be Where I am." What does the enemy say? "Kolossal Verdam! They told me, when the war began, The British Tommy always ran, And so he does, just as they said, But, Donnerwetter! it's straight ahead, Like a ram." What does the public say? "Dam! Dam! Dam! They tax me here, they tax me there, Bread is dear and the cupboard bare, I'm bound to grouse, but if it's the way To win the war, why then I'll pay Like a lamb." Arthur Conan Doyle's other poems:
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