Robert Hetrick

The Invasion

While Monsieur is vowing our nation he’ll ruin,
Deprive us o’ freedom, our monarch an’ a’,
His restless Convention declare their intention
Nae mair to let Britons o’ liberty blaw:
Their flat-bottom’d vermin, along the coast swarming, 
Are ready to bring the invaders awa’;
But our brave British freemen, both landsmen and seamen,
Will fall at their posts e’er they flinch them ava.

Our dear happy island, where commerce is smiling,
Where freedom says this is my country by law;
Our laws are as mild as the heart of a child,
And the sway of our monarch is milder than a’:
Our free constitution, since Will’s revolution,
Deserves our support, our attachment, and a’;
Whoe’er wont protect it, should not he respected,
But hiss’d like a thief from our country awa.

But Monsieur take care, of old England beware,
For her children are ready to rise at a ca’;
Your fop-doodle breeding and mountebank deeding,
John Bull he abhors, your flagaries and a’:
Yet if, through persuasion, you try the invasion,
To please your great Consul, Convention, and a’,
Redd up your affairs for your wives and your heirs,
For if ance you come owre you will near get awa.

And if to the north you would then sally forth,
There the chiefs their brave clans to battle will draw;
For Scotchmen are ready to fight like their daddies,
Repelling with fury Danes, Romans, and a’;
They’ll follow their leaders against the invaders,
Nae dangers in war will make them turn awa’;
Ye proud Gallic legions, who visit these regions,
Remember Sir Ralph and the auld Forty-twa.

But you, neighbour Pat, sir, what would ye be at, sir?
Nae mortal on earth understands you ava;
Though one party’s loyal, the other stands trial,
And hang’d are for traitors to country and law.
But Paddy be wise, man, take Sawney’s advice, man,
Stand firm as a rock to your twin brothers twa;
Despise the intrusions of Gallic delusions,
Be true to your Monarch and Erin-go-bragh.

Ye sons of sweet Coila, your hearts they will boil a’,
To think of your freedom by France ta’en awa’,
Still may you inherit brave Wallace’s spirit,
To fight for your country, and conquer or fa’.
If friendship pervade us, though Frenchmen invade us,
We will make them repent that they tried it ava;
With Macadam and Oswald, Fullarton and Boswell,
We’ll pound them to dust, their Convention, and a’.*